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BERTHA

Written by Eric Charles Narration by Roy Kinnear

Voices by Roy Kinnear and Sheila Walker Music and Lyrics by Bryan Daly

Director of animation Derek Mogford Series designed and directed by Ivor Wood

Bertha Bertha
Click above for theme music (1.5Mb zipped mp3)
bertha

Bertha was the main focus of the activities that took place at Spottiswood Factory, a small but nevertheless important engineering plant. Bertha was a very special machine because she could make anything you wanted provided she was programmed correctly. She looks very much like an old steam driven machine but she has been upgraded and is now fully computerised.

The introductory lyrics were:-

Bertha, lovely Bertha, you are a lovely machine

Any anyone who works with you will know just what I mean.

Bertha, lovely Bertha, sometimes I thing you're a dream,

When we work out what you have to do,

You can always turn the goods out, always turn the goods out,

We can depend upon you.

Clicking in the day and flashing in the night,

Your computer is shining brightly,

Some people say you've a mind of your own,

And I think that's very likely, likely.

Bertha, lovely Bertha, sometimes I thing you're a dream,

When we work out what you have to do,

You can always turn the goods out, always turn the goods out,

We can depend upon you.

The wonderful and sadly missed talent of Roy Kinnear did the narration as well as some of the voices. Sheila Walker partnered Roy in supplying the other voices.

© Woodland Animations Ltd 1987

List of Characters

Mr-sprott

Mr. Sprott

Chief Designer of things for Bertha to make

Tracy

Tracy

Mr. Sprott's design assistant (smarter than Mr. Sprott)

Mr-Willmake

Mr. Willmake

Manager of Spottiswood and Company

Mrs-McClackerty

Miss McClackerty

Mr. Willmake's secretary

Mrs-Tupp, never without her tea trolley

Mrs. Tupp

The tea Lady

Ted

Ted Turner

Operator of Bertha

Roy

Roy Willing

Ted's apprentice (not very bright)

T.O.M.

T.O.M

Little Robot controlled and built by Tracy

Mr-Duncan

Mr. Duncan

The Foreman (everything must be done correctly)

Panjid

In charge of the fork lift truck and dispatch

Nell

Packer and Stacker of products

Flo

Packer and Stacker of products


Episode Guide

One episode to begin with (many more to follow)

The Great Painting Job

Bertha is busy making jigsaws. Ted puts the pictures in the machine at one end and Bertha cuts them up. Roy checks the puzzles (when he remembers) and hands them over to Nell who packs and Flo who stacks the boxes. Suddenly eagle eyed Roy spots a problem. One of the jigsaws has a piece missing. Quickly they get Ted to stop Bertha. Ted does not understand why this has happened but decides to try another picture to see if it will dislodge the first missing piece. This does not work as another piece goes missing like the other one. Ted uses Bertha's computer to get the pieces out of the machine and eventually all the pieces are recovered.

pictures in at one end jigsaws out at the other end Part of Bertha

problems problems Ted programming Bertha

the mssing pieces at last preparing for the decorators

Meanwhile upstairs in the office, Mr. Willmake and Miss McClackerty are having problems of their own. They are busy getting ready for the decorators and everything has to be covered in white sheets. Suddenly the telephone starts to ring and they cannot find it. Mr. Willmake has asked Mr. Sprott to make a painting machine but things don't quite go as planned.

Side of Bertha Tracy designing T.O.M. out rolls TOM

In this episode Tracy designs T.O.M. (talk operated machine) who makes his very first appearance.

Tracy's Robot Song

What can we have that will do the job nicely,

Easy to control and will do what we say precisely?


Talk operated machine is what we need here,

Something I can think of that will run for a year,

Talk operated machine is what we need here,

T....O....M, T....O....M.


Talk operated machine is what I'll do then,

A super little robot that can be like a friend,

Talk operated machine, I'll call it Tom then,

T....O....M, T....O....M.


Then I can go and work with Bertha, set a programme though,

I'm sure that she will work out what I'm trying to do,

I have to work it out as quickly as I can to get it done,

I know that when I get it finished it could really be fun.


Talk operated machine is what I'll make then,

A super little robot that can be like a friend,

Talk operated machine, I'll call it Tom then,

T....O....M, T....O....M.


Note there may be an error in this first episode because in image 1 below, the stick to stop/start Bertha cannot be seen next to Ted. In image 2, however, a big stick appears when Ted has to stop Bertha.

no stick as if by magic!!!

Program Credits:

Film editor Martin Bouan Credits

Sound by Clive Pendby Produced by Woodland Animations

All the images on this page are smaller than we usually prefer but alas our source material was not very good and larger images resulted in poor resolution. We hope this will not spoil your memories of this wonderful little lunch time program for children.